So you know how it goes right? You do what you do and maybe when you do it, if you do it to the right people, it’s going to pay you like way hell, and I know my name is written in the book because at least two (okay, only two) ministers of the cloth have promised me His forgiveness and heavenly admission for the chowder I gobbled of them. Yeah, you read it, and it wasn’t just the sauce I got, they both gave me candy too, and I don’t just mean the man-candy.
I like drugs, and if you haven’t tried them you can’t know what I’m talking about but they are way unbelievable. Snort it or smoke it but don’t shoot it and believe me it’s the bitch teats and the living of life and it’s the best.
AND BRITNEY TOLED ME TO DO IT
She’s huffed the fumes of God, snorted Santa’s own candy and drunk deep enough to lose her kids Don’t try to pretend that girl doesn’t know how to party. She borrows phones from paparazzi to make private calls and she’s shaven her head twice, not to mention her kitty daily from puberty to today.
Bottom line is she’s partied it up like the rock star cock star she is, and she’s still on top of the world and the charts.
IT’S LIKE THEY SAY, ONLY USERS LOSE DRUGS
They like to say that only losers use drugs, but that’s stupid. So many rich people and successful artists, musicians and movie stars get in to the drugs, and they don’t lose out. They might say smarter that some drug users don’t lose more than other non drug users but who cares?
YOU EVER USED DRUGS???
Drugs are the best. They cost a lot, but if God didn’t want us to gobble them gone He wouldn’t have also given me my magic spot. It’s way expensive sometimes, but usually a quick party in the hills makes it free, and if it’s a Tuesday during the fall lineup, you can always hit the strip and you’re cool to make the random couple bucks it takes. I been not prostituting but meeting new guys who can gimme a buck or fifty for hanging out a bit and that’s empowering.
If it was wrong to do drugs, would Britney do it? NO! Don’t be stupid. She tells girls like me what to do (but she tells me personally because we’re friends, just check my MySpace stupid!)
No matter how crazy she gets she still gets her kids back on weekends. She doesn’t even have to take them on weekdays. She makes like $770,000 a month, even when she’s asleep or doped up at the VMAs, she only has to pay that Klingon K-Fed f’er a few ten thousands a month to watch the kids while she goes out and lives La Vida Loca (that’s Spanish for “the Vida Loca”) so she gets to do her thing and snort as mad as she wants.
Oh Britney, I miss you and I love you and you’re OK in my book. My book is getting longer by the day and you are super awesome in it. I’m not saying we kissed or anything but let’s hang.
